I also have used sleeping meds while awake just to 'not feel'. To go thru the day in a haze. Welcome to the family!  You are SO not alone. 
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I'd rather live in my car with my dogs than live in a castle without them.
Dogs may not be our whole lives, but they make our lives whole.
Don't wait for the Last Judgement. It takes place every day. -Albert Camus
Find the good and praise it. - Alex Haley
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