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I certainly don't have the answer for you; however, I have some ideas that may help you find your answer.
I was in an open AA meeting several years ago and one of the members was talking about Christmas and how his family acts and how it hurt his recovery. The more experienced members gave him a phrase that I have never forgotten: "It's just another damned day". In other words, we don't have to make our holidays what everyone else expects. We only have to do on these days what is right for us.
If we don't want to be with certain people or go to certain functions, treat that day like just another day. I know it is complicated with your kids, but don't over complicate it if you don't have to.
Figure out what you really want to do and what would be best for your kids and do that. It doesn't have to be all of the stuff you did in the past.
Good luck.
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