|
great posts...
cravings, yeah. When one of those comes I take it to the next step..ok, I say to my self, WHAT are you craving...and then remind myself of ALL the things that come with fulfilling said craving, remind myself that it's a package deal.
oh yeah, I guess I don't want THAT....
back to square one...so, what do I want? a life, a job, a relationship, a decent nights sleep...I get a drink of water, pull out my journal and scribble my way toward sanity instead of insanity.
My first question now is "Am I really hungry for THAT?"
and I remind myself of the package deal...I have to want ALL of what a thing entails before I allow myself to have it...if I don't want the consequences,then no, I don't want the "craving".
it's tricky these past two weeks, I had major surgery and have these legit pain pills and real pain...it can be really hard to sort out what to do...I mean, there are times when taking the pill IS the right thing to do, because I can't attend to normal body functions until the edge is off the pain. I sit and pray for 15 minutes over whether to take that pill or not.
Sometimes I HAVE to take it in order to properly attend to my health. This is a pretty ironic and humbling state to be in, and I am sure, an excellent test of my dedication to this thing called sobriety.
I crave being sober more than anything lately.
|