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For me it helped to minimize the pain of our breakup and protected me from doing something stupid (trying to go back).
Focusing on the fact that I was a better person, so to speak, and by this thought process believing I was better off without him allowed me the strength to stay away.
Once that purpose was achieved, and it became clear that the danger of going back was truly over, I had to mourn the loss of the relationship. Even though the relationship had far more negatives than positives, it was still a loss. That took me a long time to swallow. I thought if it was so awful then I should just be happy to be out. That I shouldn't be hurt that he cheated, she did me a favor, blah, blah, blah. I was fighting the simple truth that I was terribly hurt. Once I took away my defenses and allowed myself to mourn and feel the hurt without disclaimers, I didn't need those superiority thoughts to protect myself from the pain anymore because I had moved on.
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