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You are not stupid - you are vulnerable. We live in such a scrambled emotional world when living with an addict - it's no wonder why we can't always make good decisions.
Change is scary. I know that. BUT, if you will step out - take that step, take that chance - you will most definately get what you need. Your HP will be there to catch you. Trust in that. He did for me. He will for you.
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