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In my state child support can be sent to a state agency. This agency keeps track of the payments and then sends them on to me. Direct deposit can be arranged. My lawyer highly recommended using this service and I am glad he did.
I have learned to accept zero money from him...he must pay through the agency according to the divorce order. Then that agency deals with him and not me.
He also is late paying and I have to let the negative feelings go, but I will hold him accountable to the court order when the time comes. I am building a savings account and trying to become independent of the CS payment.
It used to make me furious and I would panic. Now, I can see I was all upset because I was expecting responsible behavior from a person that is generally irresponsible, not in recovery, and nothing changes if nothing changes.
The Serenity Prayer helped too.
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