[nodaybut2day]

My mediation session is slated for November 19. As per the requirements of the province, we will be attending at least one session so that we prove that we tried to work it out. We have a right to 6 free sessions with an accredited mediator, to hammer out the details of our separation and custody of our child.

Now that I've left the apartment, my XH is being oh-so logical and rational when writing to me. I think he knows I've hired a lawyer or he's afraid of appearing irrational/unfit. It ticks me off, to be quite honest. I *know* what a nutcase he is, I *remember* the lies he told me, the money he stole, the names he called me...and now I'm dealing with Mr. Nice Guy. Ugh.

I'm wondering if someone on SR has experience dealing with custody issues and an ex alcoholic spouse, albeit a highly functional one. In mediation, I plan on bringing up the following concerns:
1) Lack of involvement in caring for my daughter
2) Anger management issues (hitting walls, yelling, cussing, self-mutilation)
3) Daily consumption of alcohol, which I've calculated is at a minimum 2 litres of beer per weekday, more on week-ends. In addition, when I moved, I saw that he has started to take sleeping pills again, as he did when we first lived together. The combination of sedatives and alcohol REALLY concerns me with regards to him having my daughter overnight.

I think we can negociate gradual involvement in caring for my daughter, but I really have no idea how to bring up his problems with anger and the drinking. He could easily deny the anger management issues (though there are holes in the kitchen walls and he does have plenty of scars on his shoulder/upper arm). He will categorically deny that he has a drinking problem, and since he is highly functional, I don't know how to prove it's an issue.

How do I bring this up in mediation? Should I insist that while he has my daughter, he is to remain calm and sober? How do I guarantee this?