| Still wake up with guilt and anxiety...
Can I tell you every morning I open my eyes and feel as if I had had a lot to drink the night before. I actually have to think about it. It is that same sunken feeling. I have had a few very vivid dreams where I was drinking(actually relapsing) so strange. I don't ever remember dreaming at all before. That initial feeling when I wake is so horrible, but quickly replaced by a great feeling because it just isn't true.
I havent had a drink in 7 days. How come my brain won't connect with that? Got the big book yesterday...starting reading....WOW. eye-opening. I am still astounded by the shear number of AA members. Some parts I connect with others I think ...not me.
The days always starts great and by 5 I am white knuckling it. Still not 100% this is me. I think I can handle one glass now but I won't and the book only in the first few pages has already outlined that. I think I am a "hard drinker" someone stated that awhile back. So maybe I just need a break. Hmmm. I will be back around 5 when my cravings take over and leave me really wondering...Why am I doing this? Have a great day!
Day 8,
Jo
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