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welcome dodgegirl-
glad you're here.
it is very tough to quit drinking. many people are not sucessful if they aren't sick of the drink themselves. many feel that if someone tries to quit drinking for someone else, they won't make it, because it is so difficult. i think this is what the doctor means.
that said, perhaps your step father is finished with drinking and being around for his granddaughter is helping motivate him to change.
every journey of 100 miles begins with the first step.
if he wants to quit, he would do well to find an alcoholics anonymous (AA) meeting nearby and go to it. AA has helped many people to stop drinking.
as for him leaving your mother, that's between the two of them. your relationship with him is between you and him really.
that said, alcoholics often threaten to leave but rarely do. it's part of the sickness, to threaten to leave in order to manipulate the other person.
hopefully, he will go and get help. he'll need it if he really wants to stop. tell him that he doesn't have to say anything if he goes to a meeting, he can just listen. and tell him that you don't have to be an alcoholic to go to AA, you just have to want to stop drinking.
naive
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