Quote:
Originally Posted by Mandjas  If this is a disease and she is in pain, aren't my actions making her feel worse? I have made my point now, with taking access to my son away - is it time to talk?? Will it do any good?? Will I be falling back in to the same old pattern of seeking her approval all over again? Will she just end up abusing my trust again if she seems ok now but falls off the wagon in the future? I know am obsessing AGAIN but she is my mom and I do love her and acre about her welfare. BUT I love my son and his welfare more  |
(Ya, I know we're not supposed to give advice -- but I'm going to do it anyway.)
Calling AM now would be tantamount to saying, "You win, I'm erasing my boundary, everything's okay, keep drinking, nothing has to change."
But you knew that.
If AM wants to see her grandkid, she knows what she has to do: show up sober. That. Is. Not. Unreasonable. It's a nice, clear boundary. Stick to it. If she wants to give you the silent treatment and thinks you're going to cave in, so be it.
If we erase our boundaries, nothing changes.
T