[Goldberry]

Welcome Likealion, you have found a great forum.
Just FYI there are Al anon books that you can read to get more insight into this awful disease. I got the "How Al Anon Works" book from the library. It has been quite informative and helpful. Also you may want to try the meetings again... either the same one or another one that may be more your style... Don't give up too easily just yet. I go to one every week and it has been so supportive, showing me how others deal with their loved ones. It's hard at first listening to others tell their stories and just sitting there but if you listen you will hear something that may relate to your situation. Eventually you may want to share and those there will listen and may comment. There is usually no cross talking (you can talk to people after the meeting though) so someone may hear what you say and let you know how they handled something similar. It took me two-three times before I felt comfortable to talk. I was so nervous but there is no pressure to speak and after a while it became easier. The people there are not judgmental or condescending. They are caring and loving. They will not give you answers on how to change the alcoholic but instead they show you how to work on your behaviors and responses so you can cope better. Like Ginger says we need to work on our healing, our needs, our boundaries and behaviors.... Al Anon and/or the literature are very useful for that and the tools to help you get through. Hang in there and keep coming back to this forum too... It is soooo helpful!! We all need support. We are here for you. Ditto all what Ginger said and that someone's here for you to talk to. BTW the 3c's are from Al anon I think? Great reminders. They have many more.
God's peace to you,