I wrote a big long post and it got lost LOL
hopefully this will make it more concise second time round.
I think Ago builds me a up a little calling what I do a programme.
Very simply I was killing myself and I didn't want to die just yet.
The first thing I did was not drink.
I finally got it through my head that this was a fight I could not win.
Every drink was a defeat for me.
I decided not to fight anymore.
I did everything I needed to in order not to drink again - I made sure I always had other options beside the obvious one to drink - always other things to do or people to call. I've not caved yet
The other part of my 'programme' was looking at why I drank.
I wasn't always an alcoholic, and to say that's why I drank might have become the truth, but it wasn't always so.
I believe I have underlying 'reasons' for my alcoholism and I never addressed them for years except to medicate them with drink...to work on those issues is an ongoing process, and takes a lot of honesty and diligence.
I try to make myself a better person and live a better life too - there's no need to get religious about that if you don't want to - I give a lot of time to service work here, I try to be a good man and a good partner...it's not rocket science - a happy and content person, grateful for what they have after the hell of drinking is IMO less likely to risk it all by drinking again
I think in hindsight all that is harder work for me than not drinking, but its rewarding too.
I see why most people pick a defined programme - there is safety in numbers and it is reassuring to have face to face contact.
Thats the briefest explanation I can give of what I do
God no God - just pick a programme you can work with, and work it, Iriss.
D