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Sending hugs to you, Very, as I am in the same position. We are not alone. I know what you mean about seeing couples, and that may be the grief you're feeling--the loss of the marriage you had, the husband you had, your dreams of your life together with the kids in high school, college, grown up, etc. Please allow yourself to go through the stages of grief. It takes time and it is healing. Even though you may have hope that he will change, recover, that you might get your husband back, it might not happen.
My husband left after 27 years, as soon as our youngest left for college. And, although I have never been alone and am apprehensive about it, I see that I have been alone for quite a while, and my future will not include the verbal and emotional abuse, the disrespect, and the stress caused by A husband.
If he leaves you, maybe God is doing for you and your kids something good--that you may have been too afraid to do for yourself. Please keep posting, and take it one hour at a time, if you have to.
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