[Gypsy Feet]

Let me preface this by saying I am really not looking for validation, but advice. I have a couple of people in my life (thanks mom=) who are fond of telling me how pretty I am, if that worked, I wouldn't be posting this.

The idea that I am a child of God, or a creature of a loving universe is o.k. too, but I am talking about physical attractions and relations.

So, I got dumped by a guy last weekend, and I took it far harder than the situation warranted. I spiraled for a bit, and today I landed upon at least a major part of the problem. I don't believe I am pretty enough to date. Lame right? I know there are people out there who go for more than looks, as I am one, but this is some internal damage.

I have dressed down (sloppy and boy like) since my teen years. I don't wear make up, dresses or heels. I don't wear clothes that fit. When I go out, on a date or to social settings, I always assume my personality will suffice.

It is entirely possible, in fact probably, that this guy walked due to issues having nothing to do with me. I may end up being thankful, because as I poked and prodded my wound, I finally found the source of my misery, and that is, I figure I am just not his "type", because I am not most people's type.

So, I am grateful for the nice bits and pieces of me I have, and I know many have it worse. I also am ashamed to say it even matters, as I love the idea of loving myself for who I am and despising all of those "magazine" suggested archetypes. Now on to the part where I discover how to not feel substandard. Any suggestions? I am sure this is a totally common problem for women everywhere, with today's hideously unachievable beauty ideals, so has any one out there figured out how to stop feeling like they are not pretty enough?