I don't feel experienced enough to offer advice, as I am very early in my stages of acknowledgment and acceptance.
But I wanted to tell you I know how you feel and I have found in recent weeks that I have become very angry (amongst many other feelings) and I don't know how to deal with it. One thing is for sure though, the feeling absolutely passes. It reminds one thing that Denise said from Good morning - bad times and emtiona don't last forever, they will pass.
You sound like you are an amazing mother, who is very grounded in the needs of your own children.
All my very best and I hope those feelings subside soon x