[Lilya]

I´m sick with the swineflu, so I have plenty of time to review my life and think of an action plan.

For my debts, I got a great book by Jerrold Mundis and joined DA. I missed one meeting because of the flu, but I´m keeping a spending record and activated my "God box".

I need to find out how to balance work, family and health. Everything is in a fog right now, but I noticed my anxiety level has gone way down since I took action about the money problem.

I have been a procrastinator all my life without knowing it. I was a relief to find out that fear of failure and fear of success is the key to my anxiety. I tended to take swift actions and my writing career and University career took off.

Now everything is gone. I´m a "has been". I have no career, because I´m afraid of failing again. I failed twice, once six years ago when one of my books was a commercial failure and got bad reviews, then two years ago when I failed a big project for the University, due to fear, anxiety... and probably procrastination.

I feel so ashamed talking about it, but I know it is the first step to recovery.

Next I will write about what I intend to do, use check-lists and timers.

I hope some of you can relate to this problem and in any case, until next time.

Peace,