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kv816 · 10-17-2009, 10:47 PM

Just curious how those of you who journal do it; if you don't mind sharing.

I've dug out a few of my journals from over the last couple of years and it amazes me how different they are.

My first one was filled with anger towards everything, mostly what he did or said to me. It was mostly things I wished I could say to him, the things I would have said during a fight if he ever shut up long enough to let me say it. I think, at the time, I wrote HOPING he'd pick it up and read it one day and really know how I felt.

The next one was about me, what I needed to do. I rarely mentioned anything about him or anything that happened.

Then it went back to all the things he did wrong to me and how angry I was. I pretty much yelled at him page after page after page.

The last one was me, where I was, where I wanted to go. What I did today that I need to improve on.

My new one started out the same way. But there are pages from when we were talking, things he said that upset me. But it wasn't unloading on him like they had been before. It was more "he did this, this is how I felt at the time and this is what I need to do to get past the way he made me feel and not let it tear me down". It was a lot like I would recall the way I reacted to a situation and then wrote the ways I think would have been a better way to handle whatever happened. And then there were some days that he really upset me and I would go back to telling him how much he hurt me and that I'm tired of being hurt. But there was no anger, just hurt. Maybe even some realization.

Anyway. Just curious to know how others journal, if you care to share.

10-17-2009, 10:47 PM	#1 (permalink)
kv816 Only stepping forward Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Alabama, USA Posts: 330	How do you journal? Just curious how those of you who journal do it; if you don't mind sharing. I've dug out a few of my journals from over the last couple of years and it amazes me how different they are. My first one was filled with anger towards everything, mostly what he did or said to me. It was mostly things I wished I could say to him, the things I would have said during a fight if he ever shut up long enough to let me say it. I think, at the time, I wrote HOPING he'd pick it up and read it one day and really know how I felt. The next one was about me, what I needed to do. I rarely mentioned anything about him or anything that happened. Then it went back to all the things he did wrong to me and how angry I was. I pretty much yelled at him page after page after page. The last one was me, where I was, where I wanted to go. What I did today that I need to improve on. My new one started out the same way. But there are pages from when we were talking, things he said that upset me. But it wasn't unloading on him like they had been before. It was more "he did this, this is how I felt at the time and this is what I need to do to get past the way he made me feel and not let it tear me down". It was a lot like I would recall the way I reacted to a situation and then wrote the ways I think would have been a better way to handle whatever happened. And then there were some days that he really upset me and I would go back to telling him how much he hurt me and that I'm tired of being hurt. But there was no anger, just hurt. Maybe even some realization. Anyway. Just curious to know how others journal, if you care to share. __________________ When suffering becomes more difficult than changing, it's time to change. There comes a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone and trying to fix everything. It's not giving up. It's realizing you don't need certain people or the drama they bring.