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yes it is "deeper" but let's not complicate it.....however let's not pass over it with a minimum of concern.
the step in NA reads "we admitted we were powerless over addiction, that our lives had become unmanageable."
The use of drugs is a symptom of addiction, not the cause...it's the effect.
The nature of the disease is mental (obsession) and becomes physical (ingesting drugs) and spiritual (self-centeredness).
In recovery the first step is to learn exactly what we were powerless over. Learning this actually empowers us and brings us to the acceptance we need to move on with our lives without using. This information helps us in the present with what we do and don't have control over. It is only in the present we make our choice to use or not. (just for today)
I did the very same thing....when I first took a look at the steps I read it the same way!
"I admit I am powerless over drugs and my life is unmanageable."
If you really look at it.....it's quite different than how it is actually written.
When I took the actual meaning to heart and realized the different interpretation I'd come up with on my own...I had a "deeper" surrender and knew I needed help from the others.
We get sponsors so they can guide us through these things...much like what I have done here with you.
Make sense?
I use a dictionary. A LOT!
After doing just exactly what we've talked about here....it was proof I needed one! Not only am I very careful about how I am reading the literature....I make sure I am not assuming I know certain definitions of specific words!
Peace,
Missy
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