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Originally Posted by Rancorous  I havn't posted regularly in a while so I guess you all are going to get an update whether you want it or not. I recently started attending college again. I had very high hopes.
So far so good as far as grades go, my goals are currently being met in regards to that. Straight Bs so far. I'm taking a few courses I anticipated would be very difficult for me. Bs are nothing to sneeze at, especially when taking that into consideration.
However, I thought I would make some friends, or at the very least, acquaintances. I've been there for nearly six weeks. I havn't found anyone i'm overly enamored with and want to see more of. I also am not inclined to waltz up to people and start chattering inanely either. I tend to let people come to me. This is where i'm a little disappointed, not surprised by this type of thing, just a little disappointed. Disappointed is the only word I can think of to even come close to whatever i'm feeling or not feeling. People are acting exactly like I thought they would. So maybe i'm not disappointed at all. Like I said, i'm not a people person, being alone is not a new thing to me, nor does it really bother me.
It seems some people know who I am from being in class with me. They point me out in conversation with their friends. I can hear what they're saying. They probably don't think I listen in on things or don't think I can hear them from where they're standing. Basically, people think i'm crazy as hell. I don't have a name either i'm just "that girl" I don't respond. I don't care enough to respond.
My previous school was of the Catholic variety. This is the first time people havn't been asking too many questions, trying to get into my business. There hasn't been a large-scale humanitarian movement to get me to take my meds and get me to go to counseling. I've enjoyed that. I kind of like being invisible.
Its getting relatively late, so, none of this probably makes a bit of sense, but oh well, you all can deal. I'm sure someone out there has posted weirder things. |
Ranc, I'm exactly the same way. I'm shy and I don't like approaching people. That has caused problems in not making friends and not getting girlfriends. The best thing I can recommend is to get on Facebook, join groups, find people with whom you have common interests. I've found several friends on Facebook. I honestly didn't make many friends from classes. I met people outside of school. Join clubs at your college, there's plenty. Join the newspaper. Join a therapy or support group at the school. Be a part of a group. Go volunteer--that's especially helpful for depression. Don't be disappointed you haven't made friends yet, or beat yourself up, you've only been there six weeks.
And people are likely to think you're crazy if you don't start taking your meds and going to therapy. That's just the way it is. But that is something you can control. Some people will just plain write you off as crazy and there's nothing you can do about it. You don't want to be friends with them anyway, they're too judgmental and f*cked up for their own good. There will be people that will like you for you, crazy or not, some because you're crazy, but don't expect them to approach you hiding in your shell, paranoid of the world, seeing yourself as an outsider. Being "invisible" and not socializing will only make you look crazier and make you feel crazier, trust me. Also, try asking questions and participating in class, people have often found me interesting that way and approached me to be friends. Also, exercise on a regular basis if you don't already. That will help with your depression and you will attract more people.
Congrats on the grades. Bs are great considering your mental illness. When you do make friends, and you will, make sure your classes take precedence over friends, partying, extracurricular activities, etc. Please, have more fun in college than I did. Don't lock yourself in when you don't have to.
Good luck