[freya]

Welcome to SR! (Posted this in your other thread first; sorry, didn't know you were trying to move it over here.)

I'm a lesbian (specifically a q*eer femme) Al Anon member; the person who actually acts as my "sponsor" is a straight AA woman. We're both "real girly girls," but she's attracted to men and I'm attracted to butches. It's a little different, but it works. I guess I usually think of the "men work with men and women work with women" "rule" (and remember, really, there are no rules in the usual sense in AA!) as fundamentally coming down to the issue that it's just too likely to lead to awkwardness and other problems/complications if one finds oneself sexually attracted to the person upon whom one relies most heavily for program guidance and support. And who, especially in early recovery, needs more awkwardness and problems and complications????

So, find somebody who has what you want -- in terms of program, not sex-appeal -- and ask him/her to be a temporary sponsor, and, then, just trust your HP and see what happens.

freya