hey i feel your pain many years ago i carried my daughters white coffin to her grave i lost my mind for ten years or so ,i brought my other daughter up as a single dad till she was 5 then the mother snatched her away and i never saw her again for 12 long years and when i did find her again she had been raped at 13 and had spent 5 years in a mental hospital ,she lives with me now and is mentally ill very much so ,every day is a major challenge to get through
i have also lost two younger brothers and had my first cousin murdered he was also my best friend
life is so very very tough but its not how many times that you get knocked down that matter its how many times you are able to get back up
i remember when Natasha first died ,i counted the hours ,then it was the weeks ,then the years
after a few years the pain gets less and is easier to bare
but to be honest the grief never goes
it comes back when your friends who had babbies the same age start taking their children to school i actually broke down and cried when i saw them in their school uniform ,then secondry school,driving lessons,and recently the girl who was exactly the same age as my Natasha had twins ... you guessed it she called one of them Natasha
i know exactly where you are at right now i have been there its not a great place to be but believe me time helps the pain and one day you will be where i am now ,fondly remembering my daughter and helping some one else who has lost a child with kind words and understanding
