[MCake]

Thanks for your replies, they've been very helpful

Justanotherdrunk - thanks for helping me put this stuff into perspective, what other people think of me is none of my business, I can't control it (nor would I want to!).

FightingIrish - I can relate to the "nuclear bomb" of rejection; this happened to me at a very tender age, and the nuclear winter that ensued was... devastating The way I "handled" that rejection (ie by drinking my brains out for the better part of a decade) ultimately redirected my attention to the host of underlying issues that I'm now working on - codependency, low self esteem in certain areas, fear etc... and how I overcompensated these issues by sliding to the other extreme. Ugh. ("showing up for life" )

Freya -

I definitely would be thinking about whether it's right and healthy for me at this time in my life -- and you seem pretty clear that it is.

This sums it up perfectly. You analysis of being sex-crazed vs. our dowdy, quasi-Victorian culture is spot on. I do wonder why you think your son would be a "predator" if he were into women, but gets a free pass cos he's gay? ;-) Maybe I'm misunderstanding that part.

I've been second-guessing myself a lot lately... many things that appeared to be certain in the past are now up for grabs. Bottom line is, I'm not actively looking for a partner at the moment. As I'm giving off an "unavailable" vibe, I doubt the right person will show up; if he does, well... then I'm in trouble :p