[Cynay]

Welcome to SR.... Glad to meet you.

It is my understanding of the program that there be no major changes in the first year if possible. If your in a relationship do not just go end it and if your not in a relationship dont start one.

Sometimes when a person enters recovery they go through a period of time that they are so focused on AA and the people in AA that relationships suffer big time. They dont want to work through the issues caused by their drinking with their spouse and find it much easier to start a new relationship with someone who "gets" them. This is perhaps the reason they suggest not ending the relationship in the first year.

Why not to start one is pretty clear ....

People will change SO much In that first year and he would not be the first or the last to take a drink over a relationship. HOWEVER, it is also my understanding that what a sponsor suggest is just that.... a suggestion. They do not demand..... One thing I will say from my experience is that the first year is hell and they do tend to keep all their focus on their sobriety.... it is not a fun time to be in the relationship but ... he is the only person responsible for his sobriety....

you can not "make" him drink, His soberity is all on him, not you. Stick around and check out the other forms... Friends and Family of Alcoholics could be a great resource too.