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**Impurrfect** · 09-08-2009, 10:59 AM

((Tiger)) - I'm so sorry you're struggling. I know when my mom died, it was 6 months before it really hit me that she was gone. Intellectually, I knew it all along, but it took all that time for the mind/heart/gut to be able to digest the painful information.

You will see the shore, again, sweetie I promise. It doesn't seem like it, and the grieving is hard and painful. But the only way through it IS to go through it. Any shortcuts will only prolong things. We never totally lose the pain, IMO, but we get to a point where the painful days are further and further apart, and we have many, many more days where we can remember the good memories, and it doesn't rip our hearts out like it does in the beginning just to think of them.

It is a gradual progress and one day you will realize that you've gone a "little bit" and you've been "okay"...not in despair like you feel now. Then it keeps getting a little easier. The first year was my worst...every holiday, special day..it just hurt to be "the first ---- without mom". For me, I was able to heal a little more after that first year, just knowing I'd survived "the firsts".

Sending you many hugs and prayers.

Amy

09-08-2009, 10:59 AM	#2 (permalink)
Impurrfect Social Network Moderator Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Atlanta Posts: 18,284	((Tiger)) - I'm so sorry you're struggling. I know when my mom died, it was 6 months before it really hit me that she was gone. Intellectually, I knew it all along, but it took all that time for the mind/heart/gut to be able to digest the painful information. You will see the shore, again, sweetie I promise. It doesn't seem like it, and the grieving is hard and painful. But the only way through it IS to go through it. Any shortcuts will only prolong things. We never totally lose the pain, IMO, but we get to a point where the painful days are further and further apart, and we have many, many more days where we can remember the good memories, and it doesn't rip our hearts out like it does in the beginning just to think of them. It is a gradual progress and one day you will realize that you've gone a "little bit" and you've been "okay"...not in despair like you feel now. Then it keeps getting a little easier. The first year was my worst...every holiday, special day..it just hurt to be "the first ---- without mom". For me, I was able to heal a little more after that first year, just knowing I'd survived "the firsts". Sending you many hugs and prayers. Amy __________________ "I'm not where I want to be, but thank God I'm not where I used to be" - Joyce Meyer "You got what it takes you can win, today is your day to begin. Don't give up here, don't you quit, the moment is now, this is it I know that you can then you will, get to the top of the hill. Part of the fun is the climb, you just gotta make up your mind" - Shania Twain (Tinker, Elvis, Patches and Mots - Mouth Of The South)