SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information - View Single Post - My significant other and I....and my battle with alcoholism

DayWalker · 08-31-2009, 01:07 AM

MM I was in almost the exact same situation myself back about 9-10 years ago with my ex-fiance, only it was more her family than her friends or co workers. I'm not one to give relationship advice because lord knows I messed up my share of them in the past decade

but since you asked I'll just say this.

Telling her how you feel about her I don't think is a bad idea at all, but just from my own experience...pushing her for a commitment too soon before she's ready might end up pushing her away if she's not ready to get beyond the past yet. As much as you'd like for her to get over the past you know as well as anyone that you can only control yourself. So if she's not ready to get over what you guys went through while you were drinking just yet then that's something she's gonna have to do according to her own time frame ya know.

I know it's gotta be hard knowing other guys are contacting her. But if she's cares about you and is able to go beyond the past then she'll come around, but it's probably just gonna have to be on her own time frame/terms.

I feel for ya man like I said I was there myself at one point. Hope it works out for you.

Steve

08-31-2009, 01:07 AM	#3 (permalink)
DayWalker Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Michigan Posts: 728 Blog Entries: 1	MM I was in almost the exact same situation myself back about 9-10 years ago with my ex-fiance, only it was more her family than her friends or co workers. I'm not one to give relationship advice because lord knows I messed up my share of them in the past decade but since you asked I'll just say this. Telling her how you feel about her I don't think is a bad idea at all, but just from my own experience...pushing her for a commitment too soon before she's ready might end up pushing her away if she's not ready to get beyond the past yet. As much as you'd like for her to get over the past you know as well as anyone that you can only control yourself. So if she's not ready to get over what you guys went through while you were drinking just yet then that's something she's gonna have to do according to her own time frame ya know. I know it's gotta be hard knowing other guys are contacting her. But if she's cares about you and is able to go beyond the past then she'll come around, but it's probably just gonna have to be on her own time frame/terms. I feel for ya man like I said I was there myself at one point. Hope it works out for you. Steve __________________ It aint about how hard you hit, it's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward, how much you can take, and keep moving forward!