thank you for everyone's replies. pillzrbad, thank you for what you said.
that helps actually, and makes me feel better. my god, for years?
CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU, because i can not even imagine what that
must have been like. its kind of surprising really, i have absolutely no inclination toward it, i just want this "business" to completely end, 100% you know?
meditation:
yes, it said oxycodone on the bottle. i know it sounds a little weird, and i understand why you feel like something doesn't ring right, believe me, but i have read on these forums that it can take about a month with this stuff, or even more, but i guess i felt the need for a little personal communication and support/info etc, because i'm SO tired of this and really want it to completely go away. i think its got something to do with that whole thing that in my twenties i was addicted to heroin for a few years there, and my body, like tommyk said, has had an intimate relationship with opiates/downers, etc, and that i seem to be very much geared that way. years ago i tried cocaine a couple of times and i absolutely HATED it. made me feel like i was going to completely freak out. i think that's related to this in some way, physically.
then again, i'm in ny, and maybe i have swine flu or something, on top of this
nastiness
really though, i recognize the symptoms of this, from way back when, when i had the problem with heroin. its just that i'm so very suprised that its lasted this long, and its kind of "freaking me out" i guess you could say.
i actually feel kind of guilty taking up your time with this situation,
because its really just about done, and i really am ok, and will most certainly be ok, but its just the length of time of it that like i said, has kind of freaked me out, and prodded me to seek some support you know?
thank you all again for responding to me.