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Old 08-06-2009, 03:20 AM   #1 (permalink)
PlagueOnSociety
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Peoria, Illinois
Posts: 10
Sweating to Death

My thoughts might be choppy or nonlinear, sorry in advance, I'm in a lot of discomfort so it's hard to concentrate.

Was taking suboxone for 5 months, stopped taking suboxone and started using two weeks ago. Want to get back on suboxone. The problem is that I feel like my withdrawal symptoms are nearly unmanageable but it's only been 6 hours since my last use. I know I have to wait longer before taking suboxone to avoid putting myself into worse withdrawals.

Heroin is the drug that turns my life upside down, but these last two weeks I've been IVing oxycontin. My roommates have been pretty traumatized by my behavior (and physical appearance) these last couple weeks. I feel horrible about that.

I'm a nursing student and haven't gone to class in this two week period. I'm trying to sleep.. these are the worst cold sweats I've ever had.. covers on.. covers off. I feel so frustrated and overwhelmed I could cry. Guys aren't supposed to cry though. I want this to be over, how could I have forgotten so easily that drugs make my life horrible? I feel like such a fool. I am switching between being naked and putting on a coat and pants every 10 minutes to combat these hot/cold flashes, but I'm losing the battle. I am losing my mind. I feel weak and pathetic. Apologizing to myself over and over.

I flushed the rest of my drugs, I'm done. never again.

I'm afraid to tell my doctor what is happening, and even more afraid to tell my parents. They have been so proud of me, I don't want to break their hearts again for the 50th time.

I need to hear some outside perspective on this garbage situation seeing as I won't be sleeping anytime soon.
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