[Rancorous]

Hello, I generally post in the Adult Children forum, i've migrated here for now because I think i've done all I can to heal in that respect while i'm still living at home. I still need to get out, unfortunately, my minimum wage salary prevents me from doing so.

Moving on, in the past year or so, i've learned a lot about myself from therapy. Maybe i've made some progress, maybe not. I recently found out I have a dissociative disorder...the doctor didn't really give me a concrete type of dissociative disorder, but I guess thats ok because I seem to experience a wide range of symptoms, and the severity depends on how stressed/depressed I am I guess. I also don't know if I have more than one disorder. I'm having trouble learning to manage it. Really, I don't want to manage it, its just a different way of experiencing things. I just feel I need to so I can hold a job. It sorta just strikes at random. I keep trying to pass myself off as ADD because people just don't understand, I can't make them understand. I feel like I need to learn more about it, I find myself obsessively reading up on my own disorder...its just kind of mind blowing to have a name for the weird things I experience. Maybe its a phase?

I'm not sure where i'm even going with this, I just feel cut adrift, that only people who go through similar things can understand me. I feel the need to just be alone mostly. Just lost.