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StuckInBadPlace · 07-27-2009, 03:45 PM

First a little about me.

I am around 30 years old. I have had three knee surgeries that have left me with almost no cartilage left in one of my knees. The pain can be excruciating at times others just irritating as hell.

After my second surgery I had a hard time getting off the opiates. I have quit for as long as a month, but every time I quit the pain comes back. I have tried just about every over the counter pain med you can imagine, with some relief. My concern about OTC pain meds is they all have some pretty bad side effects. But with the opiates I find my self occasionally abusing them and buying them from the street, which of course is VERY EXPENSIVE AND ILLEGAL.

The reason I usually go that route is my current pain management doc gives me a VERY low dose, especially given my history of being on them for a legitimate reason, (cough) and others. When I have the time off of work I have absolutely no problem getting off of them, yea it sucks but I have to taper back down before every appt for fear of a bad UA anyways.

I realize this is quite dishonest, but I just don't know what to do. I have been alright from time to time just cruising along on what I was given but this last time my pain was insufferable so I went through 100+ Percocets in a little over a week. My months supply.

For some reason the withdrawals really haven't been that bad at all this time. I am on my second day and only have a little bit if the runs and painful crawling legs. Not to mention the legitimate pain in my knee coming back.

I have been through withdrawals more times than I can count, and don't want to do it again. It is way too hard on my wife and kids. But at the same time fear that I am on the edge of mental addiction and not just dependence. While in withdrawal however I don't scheme or think about how I can get more. I know I could probably call my doc for an early refill, something I have never done, and get one but I feel like I deserve what I got for running out soon.

My next fear is that my other knee is going to need surgery soon. I know I won't make it through that without an opiate of some kind.

Any advise please, this feels hopeless?

07-27-2009, 03:45 PM	#1 (permalink)
StuckInBadPlace Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: San Diego, CA Posts: 5	A little advise please First a little about me. I am around 30 years old. I have had three knee surgeries that have left me with almost no cartilage left in one of my knees. The pain can be excruciating at times others just irritating as hell. After my second surgery I had a hard time getting off the opiates. I have quit for as long as a month, but every time I quit the pain comes back. I have tried just about every over the counter pain med you can imagine, with some relief. My concern about OTC pain meds is they all have some pretty bad side effects. But with the opiates I find my self occasionally abusing them and buying them from the street, which of course is VERY EXPENSIVE AND ILLEGAL. The reason I usually go that route is my current pain management doc gives me a VERY low dose, especially given my history of being on them for a legitimate reason, (cough) and others. When I have the time off of work I have absolutely no problem getting off of them, yea it sucks but I have to taper back down before every appt for fear of a bad UA anyways. I realize this is quite dishonest, but I just don't know what to do. I have been alright from time to time just cruising along on what I was given but this last time my pain was insufferable so I went through 100+ Percocets in a little over a week. My months supply. For some reason the withdrawals really haven't been that bad at all this time. I am on my second day and only have a little bit if the runs and painful crawling legs. Not to mention the legitimate pain in my knee coming back. I have been through withdrawals more times than I can count, and don't want to do it again. It is way too hard on my wife and kids. But at the same time fear that I am on the edge of mental addiction and not just dependence. While in withdrawal however I don't scheme or think about how I can get more. I know I could probably call my doc for an early refill, something I have never done, and get one but I feel like I deserve what I got for running out soon. My next fear is that my other knee is going to need surgery soon. I know I won't make it through that without an opiate of some kind. Any advise please, this feels hopeless?