| brand new here
Howdy. As I sit here at my desk on my computer I feel like total crud. But gotta keep moving so they say (whom ever "they" are.)
I have been completely "clean" for three friggin days. I am hot and sweaty cold and bundled, and just going out of my mind people. For some reason I do not remember from past DT, vertigo? WTF dude? I Dont know if this is part of it, or Im just messed up and actually getting sick. huh? who knows. But all I know is that even feeling crappy I lined up a sitter for my daughter tonight so I can get my dizzy spinning butt to a meeting.
I have had a horrific 2.5 yrs (even longer, but who hasn't) and caused so much pain to myself and family. and now Im learning how to deal with out numbing myself. F that...is what I want to say and do sometimes. however, I know better. just doing better is the issues. I have been to three meetings since Saturday morning, and going tonight.
Just tired and feeling crappy doesn't help at all. i live a good 30 minutes from friends (whom are clean and sober) and have no money to my name to get anywhere. SO that part is hard. because, hey I could always get free drugs. Just never free gas.
Ok, Im done for now. Im sure I will be back somewhere exploring this site, because as I have read seems like a great place to be when in need or not. Thanks
|