[DJMH]

Hey there everyone.

My name is DJMH and I am an alcoholic. I have been in recovery since Sept 08. When I first joined this site, I was very suicidal, distraught over the damages my alcoholism had caused. My wife had recently moved out with the kids and filed for divorce back then.

Well I have gotten past that. I have been sober for several months now.

And the divorce was supposed to be finalized in Aug of this year.
Funny thing happened on the way to the divorce judge, I met a woman online at a suicide support forum. We just starting chatting thru pm's. I joined that forum around the time I joined this forum. Since I have no longer been suicidal, part of my recovery is helping others who are.

Anyway...this girl and I have been dating for a couple of months now. We are really falling for each other and quite frankly are in love.

I havent felt this way about a woman in a long time. It is a long distance relationship however. She lives 500 miles away. She is planning on coming out to see me in September.

My wife, lives 7 miles away. And in the past month she has made advances towards postponing the divorce. (she did do that) and now she has come out and said that she wants us to get back together.

Now I did most of my drinking at home. And I really burned her with that. And the disease hurt me too.

I really don't know what to do. My best friend at AA tells me I should tell my wife that I need more time. My sponser just tells me to pray on it. Which I have been doing.

I have kids. A 16yr old daughter and an 11 year old son. Sometimes I think it would be better for them if we were back together. But I also know that if it didnt work out, the next time we would split would be extremely painful for all involved.

I am supposed to talk with my wife this Thursday, away from the kids.

Currently my girlfriend is the keeper of my heart. I don't know if I should give it back to my wife.