| I'm back!
I only have my own experience to relate.
Recently I've been confused about who I am. The longer I'm sober the more I think about my identity.
Being different where I live is practically a curse. People are encouraged very strongly to go with the status quo or face isolation and rejection. I'm building confidence by the day...and if I can make it here where I live as I truly am and embrace it, then I can make it anywhere in the U.S. My goal is to just be who I am always wherever I am.
I feel like I'm both male and female. I like to say that I have the woman parts and I bleed every month...but that's about it.
At times I feel more male...at times more female. I haven't paid enough attention to note why/when/how this happens...it just does. Sometimes I feel like I’m both at once. I'm like a chameleon.
Lately I’ve been mad because I wasn’t born male…but now I’m not so sure that’s why I’m mad. I know I’ve been thinking way too much about this…and the more I think about it the more my head spins.
I’m not totally male, I’m not totally female…I don’t think the word androgynous fits…I’m not exactly butch…I’m not feminine….I’m……..me.
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A strange game. The only winning move is not to play. |