[Cherybaby66]

Hey Shea! I for one don't like the term "junkie"...but unfortunately, it applies to a lot of us. We're addicts...and so are you. There are other ways of managing chronic pain other than living on opiates. Have you spoke to a good pain management doc? And yes, what is making you crave is the fact that your brain is now hotwired to expect a certain amount of codeine a day. It's an addictive drug...and as you can see from the fact that you need to take more and more to get high...you have already built up quite a tolerance. It is going to get to the point where you aren't going to be able to manage your pain OR get high off the dosage you get. What then?

I was an opiate addict for a year and a half...taking 60 pills of percocet 19/650's in just a couple of days. It was a very expensive habit too. Didn't care. Put my family into financial turmoil over my habit because I lost my job. Didn't care about anything or anyone if they couldn't get me my drugs. Nothing else matters. You seem to be in that boat right now...and you are heading for rocky waters, my friend.

I quit, cold turkey, about 54 days ago. I just had to get away from it. My husband has chronic pain issues, like you do...although, he doesn't abuse. He takes his pills only when he needs them...a lot less than what is prescribed to him. Do you have someone you can give your pain pills to that can dole them out to you as needed instead of you possessing the bottle? Sometimes that is a great help.

You have to be honest with your doctors, Shea. And yourself. That's the first step toward getting clean...being honest with yourself. You have a problem that well oversteps the need of just managing your pain. You need to get a support team on your side...and yes, that will include doctors, friends and family and a good old fashioned NA meeting as often as you can go. Of course, you have this forum too...which is a good start. The support of this forum has gotten me through some very tough times in the middle of the night.

Good luck to you, Shea. It's not going to be easy...but it can be done. You have to WANT it. Really want it...and take your life back.