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Hi there.
I too used to write letters that I never sent. It helped me to verbalize the situation and "see" what had happened. I would write and re-write editing to make it exactly how I felt and what I experienced.
The last letter I wrote I did send to the ex. He never responded. My therapist told me to expect nothing from him as we would not be in that mess if he was rational and behaved in a logical fashion. I suspect the OW read it as she did reply to me. I did not anticipate that one, but I ignored her.
Whatever you decide to do, do it for you. He is unreliable at best, so remember that when expecting anything from him. His reactions are not "normal," so this situation will not be normal all of the sudden.
Hugs
Miss
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