hay im 45 i cant take this ****, i love the male body it turns me on no doubt there, but usualy there 20 or at least under 30,my ageor older men dont do it for me.. im not a perv i just like guys in there 20s .
but now ive got this girl at work that realy likes me hell shes even said she wants to marry me,, it feels so good to have a woman care for me like she does, and i have a good time with her at work always laughing and joking ect,,
and shes my age. pretty and she seems to accept me as i am, although i havent told her im gay yet, could it be ive been wrong all along that my attration to guys has been just about sex and nothing else?? im lonely for love and attention this is true and ive never realy had the kind of relationship with another man like im feeling with her. but im just not turned on by the girl sexualy wish i was but im not,
i want to have a guy feel for me like she does for me, and i want to feel like that for a guy, but i sure do miss my times with my mom now that shes gone,, maybey im looking for a mother figuar. lol
anyway still sober thank god i sure had more luck in the depratment of sex when i was drinking then i do now..without for 3 years yikes..i guess im looking for more then just sex had plenty of that, but i want more today, just trying to understand my attraction to this girl,, anyone ever have similar experiance?? be nice guys im confused enough lol..
greatful to be sober and have the chance to grow..
