Hmm...
I did find my experiences with psychiatrist
and my depression useful at the time.
Once I quit drinking...the depression vanished
no more psychiatrist ...
I don't think anyone can give you a definate answer.
I'm really sorry you find yourself in this painful situation.
Have you considered praying for peace
and the ability to forgive your wife?
Pray for her peace of mind too.
Please try that when the negetive thoughts come.
Blessings to both of you...
And...here is a link for another idea
http://www.smartrecovery.org/