[paulmh]

First of all with the disclaimer that this is all hindsight, and what actually happened to me was that I entered into the process of AA wholeheartedly and without the reservations that some residual hope that I might "fix" things myself would've brought....

I like the word "wholeness". In describing my own experience with this step I would be more likely to use the words "frequency" and "harmony" though. Having first been convinced of my individual hopelessness, and then almost immediately having grasped that there was hope if I was only willing to not carry on trying to impose my will on the world, what began to happen for me in step 3 was that I started the practices which could bring my frequency into harmony with the Higher Power. I'm glad that no-one in AA told me it had to be a Christian G*d or whatever that I had to believe in - but they made it quite plain that I had to have a Higher Power. It seems to me that this step is also about beginning to get things back in proportion - that overinflated ego is reduced, one act of humility or selflessness or consideration, at a time, starting with recognising that I am in fact wholly dependent upon the universe for my existence anyway.

Certainly the word I used at the start was "universe". I handed myself back into the care of the "universe", tried to stop being in control, worrying about control, projecting outcomes and expectations. Now I use the word "G*d" like my fellows. Even though I know we all have a different conception of it, it's the fact that we share the experience, that we have that in common and it bonds us - that's what's important. Not "who to". Just "that we do".