ARGGHH!! I just want to scream at the top of my lungs today! My sis in law is now out of rehab and as far as staying clean, so far so good, which is one good thing, but I don't think, no scratch that, I know, she has NO IDEA how bad she was and refuses to believe that she has hurt anyone with her addiction.
As I've said before, I tried all I could to help her and once I realized that it was a cycle and my life was becoming unmanagable because I was taking care of her, I had to stop talking to her and sent a letter explaining why. I tried being supportive and sent letters and cards while she was in rehab offering encouragement and telling her I was proud of her, you know the drill...
So, her mom was coming over for a BBQ the other day and I kept hearing that my sis was afraid of seeing us, so I sent a text inviting her and telling her that we have no judgements and it would be great to see her..
Well, her mom came without her and said it was because she was still so hurt by me and hasn't forgiven me yet!? I almost laughed at the nerve!! She says that she never did naything other than be helpful at my house and has never behaved badly, but when she needed me I wouldn't answer the phone after all she did for us!!! This coming from the person who I'd cancel plans to help her deal with her constant crisis's and breakdowns and she'd get high with her boyfriend and never show up... she'd show up hours late if at all for all of the kids parties or dinners or anything we had planned with her, but she swears that I'm making it all up and she was there for everything?! Now she's mad at me and I hurt her? What the hell?
I did say in the first letter that I had pretty much put my life on hold and put her first to help her out, but I also said that I knew it was my choice and that I did not see it as a burden until I realized it was a cycle... now she's acting like I said that we never wanted her here and she feels like the whole relationship was fake and if I didn't wante her around I shouldn't have invited her, she was "never intrusive and was always helpful and well behaved" here...
I'm sorry for ranting like this, I just can't believe that after everything I've put up with and done for her, this is the thanks I get, a slap in the face and I become the bad guy. The thing is, I don't even need an apology from her, as far as I was concerned, it was done while she was sick and we can work from here, but now that I know she doesn't even think she did anything wrong, I don't know if I can move past that. I'm so angry that she is blaming me for the demise of our relationship and her not being around for my kids. I wasn't angry with her brfore, just worried and sad, but now I'm so hurt and angry that I want to just spit!! Anyone go through anything like this with their addicted loved ones before?
