RG, I'm sorry you're feeling this way
and I hope that seeing your therapist and the med adjustment helps. Cutting isn't the answer, and while the tattoos and other non-essentials can help us to feel good temporarily, we end up dealing with that big hole in our soul when the high wears off. I used alcohol to fill that hole for so many years.
I don't have the answer, and I pray that you continue to seek help, but what I can tell you is that nobody, NOBODY, is useless and hopeless. You're here looking for support and help in your recovery, that makes you a winner in my book.
No need to apologize, keep reaching out, others will respond here soon.