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Thanks for this. I have often wondered about this issue. One of my friends calls "adjective addicts" by another term: "Andas." Because they often say stuff like I'm John, an addict and a alcoholic. People visibly cringe when people identify this way at a lot of meetings I go to. I agree that people should be accepted no matter how they term their disease, but I do worry that they will stay sick unless they come to believe they are addicts, and that they are more the same then different from the rest of us. I see people using adjectives and andas as a way to set themselves apart.
A clarity statement isn't the way to help people who are trying to set themselves apart. In fact, it could make them feel more alienated, as Andy's post details.
My friend R, as I've shared before, identifies herself as "R, a blessed recovering addict." I think it kind of bothers me because she has often shared that she thinks she isn't as much of a "loser" as the other addicts at NA (she makes an exception for me. I guess I'm lucky...lol). I'm kind of afraid that she will identify herself right on out of the room one day as too good for most of us.
I must admit to wondering if I was too functional to really belong in NA for quite awhile. Almost everyone but me had lost everything to their disease. But step work has shown me that I'm just as sick, just luckier than many, and I was already more informed about NA, so that I was fortunate to be able to know what to do when I realized I had a problem. Now I try to explain this to R, but it doesn't seem to work. I hope she sticks around long enough to come to believe.
Just for today, God, keep me vigilant against my own ego, which can float me right out of recovery.
Love,
KJ
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