| It hurts to much to continue loving him
I have been in a relationship for over a year, with a man whom I meant during one of my drunken nights, although I can say that I met him after I slam my head against a pole and past out. He seem to take care of me to the point that I can say I owe some of being sober to him. Now it turns out that he has anger issues and snaps at me and everyone including his mom for any reason thats something I cant deal with, the verbal abuse.
I have a little over 5 months sober and last night had a dream that I was sneaking around drinking and using coke. I am scared, I dont know if I am scared because I need to end this relationship or is it because my dream is predicting to me what is going to happen in the near future.. I need courage to make up my mind and strength to not fall through the gates of the hell I was in over 5 months ago.
I feel like I failed once again...
Thanks,
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You've got to get up every morning with a smile on your face,
And show the world all the love in your heart,
Then people gonna treat you better.
You're gonna find, yes, you will,
That you're beautiful, as you feel.
--Carole King
Sober since Jan. 7, 2009
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