@Jimba: My Dr. told me to use the COWS, and that "when I feel like I can't take it any longer, wait two more hours", and told me that given my habit, I'd probably have to wait about 36 hours. I really doubt thats true, and think he's just trying to cover his own ass, and be sure nothing goes wrong. Then I was told to take an 8mg pill, and then if I'm still feeling ****** in a few hours, take as needed.
The longest I've made it so far is 27hours, and now that I can look back on it, I really feel like I was ready to take it then. I'm just so paranoid of precipitated w/d since it's happened to me before. In fact, I'm doing this with my partner, and while trying the other day he took the subs too early (waited 20hours, his habit is 2x the size of mine), and now he finally understands why I'm so paranoid.
But yeah, basically, my biggest problem is being sure, and knowing when I'm ready to take my first pill. And re: doing induction in the Dr's office, b/c he'll know for sure when I'm ready, thats not necessarily true. The first time I went into prec. w/d from taking the Subs too early was under the care of a Dr. She was so intent on getting me through the process and out of her office, she gave me the Subs too early.
And also (I know this is getting long), but did anyone else have such problems getting on Subs, ie, having to try multiple times before finally getting on it? Though part of me feels like I want to get clean so badly, and I'm always trying to do that, part of me thinks "well if you really wanted it, you'd do it". Which is basically all I hear on this board. Did anyone else take multiple tries? Am I doomed for failure and many more years of addiction here?