[NoelleR]

"...I guess the truth is I really can't have even one or it'll lead to more. Even if I would have had one I would have said "oh, I just had one the other day so I can go to the store and do it again" - invariably to only end up with a whole bottle I'd drink and maybe more..."

WTG Katie...!!! It takes some folks years (well, maybe just months; it just seems like years) to get this (what you wrote here). Goodonya!

I know you don't like AA, with its religousness/spiritualness, etc., and especially regarding that 1st step's use of the word 'powerless' and most AAer's thoughts regarding powerlessness (their own and that of others), but for me AA's 1st step was just what you wrote.....I realized that I couldn't drink, not even one; I WAS powerless over alcohol when I put it in my body, but NOT no moah....My first step was my realization (both admitting and accepting) that I couldn't drink like so many others (normies...?), and I had to quit "for good 'n all."

In fact, for me, in my recovery journey, I truly didn't like most of what a lot of the AA steps had to say (as an atheist I figured I was doomed), but I found that Father Martin's approach to the first three steps worked for me.....it's real simple (just the way I like things).............:

1) There's a problem;
2) There's a solution; and
3) I get to choose which one I want for my life.....the problem or the solution.

From then on my recovery journey took many twists and turns, but I found that with a good foundation (those first three steps), I could do it; I could turn my life around and have a truly good/great life.

I just wanted to pop in here, Katie, and give you a slap (a light tap, actually) on the the back, and wish you well in whatever program (design for living) you choose...............


All the Best 2u,
NoelleR