I need to vent. im so scared of everything, and failing at this. i dont deserve to belong here. i feel so awful. im ruining my relationship, i cant find work, i desperately need money.. interviews from hell.. i just cant stop crying.. even with taking xanax which i shouldnt because i abuse it. im so lost. i need someone. i think everyone has given up on me. i cant do this. im such an awful destructive person. im sorry. i cant go through mothers day. i cant...