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jazzz · 04-23-2009, 06:47 PM

My girlfriend is very angry with me at the moment. She insists I flirted with a girl visiting us with some other friends of mine. The problem is, I don't know what she's talking about. I find myself very very misunderstood. I've got social anxiety. I've got IT cause it feels like a disease. It's taking so much of my mental energy, and I feel empy inside. "Vacant" is the word, perhaps..

I didn't drink alcohol (quit 2 months ago, was a binge drinker) but I smoked pot, and when I do that I become very socially anxious (yet I do it, why?) and so I put on this facade. It's like what's inside doesn't fit the outside at all.

I have no respect for myself whatsoever.

Why can't I relax and connect??

What is this? I feel so spaced sometimes. Scared. Alone. Determined to not drink (coz I think it will save me).

04-23-2009, 06:47 PM	#1 (permalink)
jazzz Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Europe Posts: 96	What, flirting?? My girlfriend is very angry with me at the moment. She insists I flirted with a girl visiting us with some other friends of mine. The problem is, I don't know what she's talking about. I find myself very very misunderstood. I've got social anxiety. I've got IT cause it feels like a disease. It's taking so much of my mental energy, and I feel empy inside. "Vacant" is the word, perhaps.. I didn't drink alcohol (quit 2 months ago, was a binge drinker) but I smoked pot, and when I do that I become very socially anxious (yet I do it, why?) and so I put on this facade. It's like what's inside doesn't fit the outside at all. I have no respect for myself whatsoever. Why can't I relax and connect?? What is this? I feel so spaced sometimes. Scared. Alone. Determined to not drink (coz I think it will save me).