welcome from another mom...
working the Al-anon program and steps has helped me in all my relationships.
I've made a couple great friends from the mtg. that are also a needed support system.
Don't go down w/ your AD. Focus on yourself and make the changes that you have control over. When we start taking our own inventory we see there is lots of room for change with ourself.
My son has just completed his 3rd inpatient rehab. This one lasted a yr. plus another he is now committed to another 6 mos. of after care outpatient sober home.
Don't give up on your girl but be patient and detach as necessary until she is ready to go. Then get her to treatment.