[freya]

"It is hardly a sign of good mental health to be well-adjusted (i.e. "normal") in a sick society." -- J. Krishnamurti

...and, my own ideas from an earlier thread entitled "Just say 'No' to 'Normal'":

Well, I've been seeing the word "normal" thrown around this site so much lately that it's beginning to get a little scary. Therefore, I think it's time for me to come clean about something here: my recovery has absolutely nothing to do with my wanting or trying to become "normal."

In fact, I have to say that I hate the word "normal;" I hate the ideas behind the word "normal;" I hate the apparent motivations behind the use of the word "normal;" I hate the way I've seen the desire for "normal" f*ck up some pretty good recoveries.

As it's commonly used, the word "normal" can mean either "healthy" or "common/typical/average"...but, it is often implicitly and dangerously used to mean both of those things at the same time (i.e as when someone in recovery says that he "is not like 'normal' people," or "I want to date a 'normal' person"). And that is a total mindf*ck because, as far as I can tell, those two meanings are, in actual lived-experience, utterly and absolutely contradictory.

The reality is that, unfortunately, what is "normal," in the sense of common, and/or average, and/or typical in this world is far, far from what is "normal" in the sense of healthy. And, based on what I see in those seriously-committed-to-recovery people I know, the the more "normal" (healthy) people become through working their recoveries, the less "normal" (typical/average/common) they are....
.....and, personally, I find that to be a good and admirable thing.....

....because when I think about what is typical/average/common in the world around me I think about all the dysfunction, all the lying, all the denial, all the fear, all the hatred, all the shame, all the spiritual isolation, etc...etc....etc...basically, all of the insanity that we see glamorized and sensationalized and conveniently packaged for our enter-and-info-tainment all day, everyday in our "normal" culture....

....and none of THAT has anything to do with MY recovery (nor is it in any way conducive to my being or becoming healthy in any way) -- other than insofar as it is what makes recovery necessary in the first place.

I feel like I can say with a fair amount of certainty that my HP doesn't make "normal;" My HP makes unique and special and individual and different...and my recovery is about discovering, honoring and realizing everything that HP has made me; I have no intention of diminishing myself or insulting my HP by settling for or trying to conform to "normal."

freya