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**Astro** · 03-31-2009, 10:25 PM

Wow, I'm amazed at the responses, so many things I hadn't considered but they all make so much sense.

When I started reading history's response I had a quick revelation about our weekend visits.........I've been partially steering the mood myself, or I guess it's a lack of steering. As soon as we sit down I start fearing where we're heading, I can feel my face sink into a frown and I begin to brace myself for the misery.

He starts his drinking in the evenings, long past the time when he's over here, but I've had to put a quick stop to some drunk-dials in the past, I don't care for the slurred one-sided convos he won't remember the next day. He knows I take my recovery very seriously and seems to respect it.

We've got a private park across the street from the new house, maybe this Sunday I'll try inviting him for a walk, the kids like the playground anyway.

I called him this afternoon and left a message to see how he's feeling. When he called back later he sounded surprisingly good. He started to tell me he was at Valley Lu..... now keep in mind that the heart center used to be Valley Lutheran Hospital. Shocked the hell out of me when it turned out he was at Valle Luna Mexican Restaurant for a meeting with his grief support group. He said he didn't feel like sticking around for long, but I swear he sounded pretty happy. He also talked about getting some second opinions from other heart doctors, he's had bad results with the surgeries that were done from the groin area.

I know what you mean Give, for the last few years I've really started to have faith on the paths we each take on our journey in life, I understand that I'm not the director for his path. And you can write me a novella anytime, any of you can, I'm so thankful for your responses and insight.

I'll keep you updated on how things are going. One day at a time, progress not perfection, and somedays it'll be one step forward and three steps back.

Cynay and I had a nice dinner date after our CoDA meeting tonight. Gourmet burgers. Yum. I think I've got a smile back on my face

03-31-2009, 10:25 PM	#5 (permalink)
Astro Forum Leader Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family! Posts: 11,837	Wow, I'm amazed at the responses, so many things I hadn't considered but they all make so much sense. When I started reading history's response I had a quick revelation about our weekend visits.........I've been partially steering the mood myself, or I guess it's a lack of steering. As soon as we sit down I start fearing where we're heading, I can feel my face sink into a frown and I begin to brace myself for the misery. He starts his drinking in the evenings, long past the time when he's over here, but I've had to put a quick stop to some drunk-dials in the past, I don't care for the slurred one-sided convos he won't remember the next day. He knows I take my recovery very seriously and seems to respect it. We've got a private park across the street from the new house, maybe this Sunday I'll try inviting him for a walk, the kids like the playground anyway. I called him this afternoon and left a message to see how he's feeling. When he called back later he sounded surprisingly good. He started to tell me he was at Valley Lu..... now keep in mind that the heart center used to be Valley Lutheran Hospital. Shocked the hell out of me when it turned out he was at Valle Luna Mexican Restaurant for a meeting with his grief support group. He said he didn't feel like sticking around for long, but I swear he sounded pretty happy. He also talked about getting some second opinions from other heart doctors, he's had bad results with the surgeries that were done from the groin area. I know what you mean Give, for the last few years I've really started to have faith on the paths we each take on our journey in life, I understand that I'm not the director for his path. And you can write me a novella anytime, any of you can, I'm so thankful for your responses and insight. I'll keep you updated on how things are going. One day at a time, progress not perfection, and somedays it'll be one step forward and three steps back. Cynay and I had a nice dinner date after our CoDA meeting tonight. Gourmet burgers. Yum. I think I've got a smile back on my face __________________ "Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty, and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming---WOW-What a ride!"