|
Ok, it is a new day...day 8. The clear headedness continues. I still don't want oxycontin or any other opiate. Besides seeing what they did to me (akin to alcoholism) I don't have ANY back pain.
I am so thankful for this time in my life because I am looking at it with no clouds in the way, and I have believable hope. My wife even felt comfortable enough to talk with me about my plans with my meeting with the doctor (in which I plan to fully disclose my opiate experiences and new freedom from back pain). This is a fragile time for her and I am so grateful to see a little of her hope that this can get better. It is up to me to keep her hope alive and I am so wanting to do that.
I have prayed a lot for freedom from back pain and opiate dependency. Will I relapse? I don't know. I hope not. But having this time of clarity is going to help me to reverse some of the damage that's been done. I am going to work like a honey bee to make the most of it. I pray that God will help me to get as much accomplished as possible.
It has been said many times that nothing worth having usually comes without great effort and sacrifice. I lost close to $1,000 dollars because I couldnt work this week, I had RLS, depression, diarrhea and further strained my marriage. The way I am feeling now along with a little interaction with my wife makes the week's experiences seem trivial.
|