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Sorry. I see I should've clarified.
I'm not afraid of dying - the unfortunate part of being human is we have a 100% mortality rate. I am afraid he will go out on one of his binges and die. He is a good person in his heart, though I know that is not what drives him now.
I am afraid if I let him go to get my life back on track, and he dies, I will feel guilty. I think that is why I have been with him for this long - guilt. I feel obligated to help him for some reason - I'm a codie, I know. I think it's in my nature. I was a medic for a time and that was my job - to help those who couldn't help themselves.
I'm just wondering if there is hope after the addict is out of my life? Is there hope that I can let go and will be ok with whatever happens after that?
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"The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life."
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